Qualifications For a Real Life Prince Charming

I, like many other girls, have been long awaiting a Prince Charming.

Since my childhood, the idea of being swept off my feet and carried away into the sunset on a horse set in the direction of a large, ostentatious castle has seemed like the ultimate #LifeGoal. And generally, the princesses we see in the movies have no trouble finding exactly the right man to complement them, or they don't have a man at all (see Merida and Elsa). But in this day in age, finding that perfect of a guy seems just unrealistic. I may be just a teenager, but I realize that finding true love requires more than a heroic rescue, royal title, or handsome face.

To do this right, let's start out by examining my personal favorite Disney prince: Flynn Rider, or as we true fans know him, Eugene Fitzherbert.

Okay so first thing's first. This is the most attractive cartoon character any of us have ever seen, and I remember sitting in the theater when I saw Tangled for the first time and thinking to myself, "Wow. This Flynn guy may be giving my boy Peter Pan a run for his money!" We all love Eugene! He's gorgeous, he's goofy and hilarious, he's a reformed character, he questions the fact that all the other characters randomly break out in song, and most of all, his relationship with Rapunzel makes all our little hearts flutter. AND BONUS, he sacrifices his own life (spoilers!) so that Rapunzel doesn't have to. 

But sadly, not all guys can be Flynn Rider.

The biggest thing about Disney beaus that makes them so great is their innocence. It seems that there just simply aren't many respectable, respectful, caring, I-would-literally-die-for-you guys in this day and age. 

And then there is that one standard that not even the Disney princes can meet, a faith in God that's stronger than even Gaston's biceps. 

One of my favorite excerpts about Godly men in the Bible is in 1 Timothy 3, the Qualifications of Overseers and Deacons. Though these are written as guidelines for leaders in the Church, I believe these should also be standards for the men we starry-eyed girls are looking for. Let's take a look.

Now the overseer must be above reproach, the husband of but one wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him with proper respect... He must not be a recent convert, or he may become conceited and fall under the same judgment as the devil. He must also have a good reputation with outsiders, so he will not fall into disgrace and into the devil's trap. 

How often do we see examples of men like this, who love God so much, and hold themselves and others in such respect? Not very often. The tendency is to think, "Guys like this just don't exist!" and settle for less. But that is so not true.

The moment you compromise your standards is the moment you begin to lose the fight.

Our society tells us that all love takes is an attractive enough guy and girl to like each other. Once girls grow out of Disney, the "princes" they look to to set their standards begin to look more like this...

That's Justin Bieber, but I'm sure you knew that. He's so cute, right? Yeah. This is a mugshot, by the way. The sad, sad truth is that arrests, drug use, etc. aren't enough to keep girls from idolizing this guy and others like him! When did we transition from the prince standard to... this? 

I challenge every girl out there to rethink what makes a Godly man. 

God has a plan for all of us. I truly believe that He still makes men who love Him and have pure hearts. It's up to us to keep the faith and wait it out for the right guys. And even after all this, who says we need to get married anyway? If I never end up finding my Prince Charming, you better believe I'll still keep my heart in Jesus and embrace the fact that nostalgia is always just a Disney movie away. 

Thanksgiving isn't just for November.

A yoga teacher I used to take classes from always began and ended her practice by instructing us to all live out an "attitude of gratitude". I've been recalling this often lately, and it's becoming more and more obvious to me that I, like many others, do not show enough gratitude for all the blessings in my life.

Thanksgiving is a subject we like to reserve for what America has nicknamed "Turkey Day". It's a subject so overlooked in society that immediately after the time we designate for Thanksgiving Day, we go out and splurge on new things.

We are doing this wrong.

Thanksgiving isn't a day, season, or fancy dinner. Gratitude is a lifestyle. It's a daily choice. It's a decision.

I'm writing this because it took all too much for me to realise how richly I'm blessed. It took my being overwhelmed by the privileges of life to understand that I am truly blessed. And that brings me to the next principle of thankfulness.

Thankfulness goes hand in hand with humility.

We must be humble to be thankful. We cannot be pridefully thankful, because pride contradicts the purpose of gratitude. Gratitude is the realisation that the things we have are blessings; gifts freely given, things that can't necessarily just be earned. You can earn a living, but you can't earn miracles. We are thankful when we realise that our blessings are the result of grace.

I must learn to live gratitude as a lifestyle, and not as an occasion. I must learn to live thankfulness as a choice, and not as an obligation.


Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. {1 Thessalonians 5:18}

Seven Things Ministers' Kids Want You To Know

1. We aren't all-knowing theologians. 

Contrary to common belief, our parents are the ones with the college degrees. Not us. Don't treat us like we should know a myriad more than our adolescent peers just because of who our parents are. 

2. We don't know when that church event is, so please don't ask us.

Two words: church calendar. 

3. We will make mistakes.

Don't be surprised when we do stupid kiddish things, because we are indeed kids, who do stupid things. 

4. We get offended when you insult our parents in front of us.

We might not have liked our dad's sermon or our mom's devotional talk either, but that doesn't make it okay with us for you to complain and bad-mouth them around us. Take your slandering somewhere else.

5. We want to live normal lives, sometimes without the "ministry kid" strings attached. 

Sure, there are a lot of great things that come with having parents in ministry! But often we yearn to live as ordinary kids without the weight of our parents' titles. 

6. Our hearts and homes are scattered in multiple places. 

Many of us have moved several times in our lives. Don't expect us to completely acclimate to our current setting, because our hearts will be forever torn between other special places, and that's okay.

7. We aren't generally as intimidating as we seem.

Sure, we are different. We still need friends, though. Give us a chance, we aren't so bad.

Dear Adults, I Have a Life Outside My Phone. Sincerely, Teenagers.

I realize that for many teenagers, phone addiction is a big problem.

At times I face this problem myself.

The underlying problem, however, is that some teens, like myself, feel unfairly stereotyped with this disease of phone addiction. Just because a teenager is spotted holding a mobile device does not mean that piece of technology is the center of their universe. And if one teenager's sole existence is their phone, that doesn't mean that is the case for every teen on the face of the earth.

Here are some examples of the things that collectively take up the majority of my time besides my iPhone:
-piano
-church activities
-school activities
-school work/homework (there is a LOT of it)
-miscellaneous social events 

-jobs such as babysitting/chores 

-independent reading/writing 

So you see, behind the phone very well could be an accomplished athlete, academic superstar, hard worker, dedicated Christian, etc, and you'll never know if you routinely assume all teens to simply and primarily be phone addicts. 

At the end of the day, stereotypes don't decide our intentions or personalities. We do. 

So if we are content with being labeled as our technology, so be it.

Something tells me we aren't all so accepting of that. 

Why Americans Don't Accept Jesus

I had a discussion with my mother on the way home from church today about a couple of my close friends who I am trying to introduce to Christianity. One of those is Hindu, the other of which was raised in a home where he is to remain theologically neutral until his eighteenth birthday. My original question to my mom was if God would allow good people in heaven, even if they were of other religions. She quoted the verse about how Jesus is THE WAY, and that no one gets to The Father but through Him. Even so, I've continually been trying to evangelize simply for the fact that they need saving just like everyone else.

Evangelism has been especially difficult with the second of these friends. He has a harder time accepting what I'm presenting because he's never been given the choice to accept for himself. Because of his upbringing, the need for an almighty God is absent from his life, and he sees no practicality in "worrying about it".

This has sparked my interest in the minds of Americans and why we have a hard time accepting Jesus as Saviour. I'm beginning to understand this by observation of the middle/upper class American state of mind.

You don't need to be provided for if you can easily conjure up anything you need with a snap of your fingers.

You don't need rescue from suffering when you've led a life of luxury.

We lounge and put our feet up in our fancy chairs at our holiday homes while sunbathing with our Oakleys to protect our eyes from the very sun that shines over the heads of the underpriveleged, orphaned, oblivious, and poor.

We, as Americans, proudly declare ourselves as "on top".

And we are.

It is easy for those who need to be provided for to need a provider, and it's easy for those who suffer to need a rescuer.

We, my friends, need a divine intervention in our lives just as much as they do.

We need to get off our independent, self-sufficient high horses.

We need Jesus.


"Do you have any idea how difficult it is for people who 'have it all' to enter God's kingdom? You can't imagine how difficult. I'd say it's easier for a camel to go through a needle's eye than or the rich to get into God's kingdom." (Mark 10:23-25 MSG)

Lessons Learned in Texas

We are coming up on my family's one year anniversary with Texas. In the time we have spent here, I have learned many new and valuable things about this glorified country we call a state- and I guess that statement right there gives me Lesson #1...

1. They say Texas is a state, but not really. It's a country.
You'll notice this one perhaps the quickest. Texas is the one place I've been where everything is Texas themed. It's like a big Texas theme park. You can buy Texas mugs, stickers, rugs, placemats, bikes, blankets, magnets, jewelry, clothing... You never have to look far to find Texas merchandise. Texans win the "State Pride Award", hands down. Even if we do have a conspiracy theory that they will eventually secede from the United States. 

To please my mother, I have observed all the fashion trends here in this Great Land. Who knew fashion was a cultural experience? This is a lesson or two in itself.

2. Texans, as much as they try to convince you that they aren't all cowboys, really are.
Boots, boots, boots. Lots of boots. Wrangler jeans, anyone? Even those I know who don't own cowpoke or horses or whatever still wear all the cowboy apparel! They may not technically be cowboys and cowgirls, but they will dress like 'em nonetheless. 

3. You can never have too many rhinestones, crosses, and camo.
These are the three components that really seal the deal with Texas fashion. Most of the time, you can find all three in one item of clothing. Something about pink or traditional green camouflage and plastic jewels just really says "Jesus".

Relationship building has certainly been interesting here in Texas. Meeting new people and making new friends has never been easier... and harder.

4. Be careful little mouth what you say!
Just writing this article somewhat defies that there rule. Texans are capable of being easily offended! This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it sure does teach you to be careful with what you allow to exit your mouth. For my expertly northern family and I, this has been a challenge so far. I've never had to be so considerate with what opinions I share! 

5. Barriers must be broken to form real relationships.
Lots of people here have this wall built around them, making it hard to connect. There is an outside and inside person, and most people will only let you get to know what's on the outside. You will know you've built a good relationship when you can get to the person on the inside of the barrier.

Earlier this year we attended the rodeo, just to see what it was all about. So much goes on at the rodeo. So. Much. There's the carnival, the art, the food, the concert, the show animals.... You can take three days and still not cover everything this event has to offer.

6. Try the fried stuff.
The fried food we ate at the rodeo was the best and worst experience of our lives. We learned not to acknowledge the fact that deep fried cheesecake on a stick could quite possibly bring our lives to an unfortunate and untimely end. It's all part of the experience!

7. Texans DO have souls.
My little animal-loving brother and I watched through our hands in horror of tiny, harmless calfs being strangled and tackled in the dirt for sport. I honestly wondered for days after seeing that if these insane people valued innocent life at all. I have concluded that Jesus still loves their souls, even if they are dark and filled with cow torture.

As soon as we got here, we sought out shopping centers. We discovered a few that we really like, because after all, shopping in Texas is quite the activity.

8. Grocery shopping is more fun in Texas.
This may be more of an opinion of mine (and my mother's) than a general rule, but honestly. HEB. Need I say more? 

9. Filling your gas tank has never been more efficient!
Buc-ee's. It's not just a gas station. It has everything. You can get anything from house decor to your next meal! Did I mention the cleanest restrooms on the planet? You can buy anything with a beaver head on it for a few extra dollars. Oh, and I guess you can get gas in your car, too.

Everybody knows that Texas is renowned for it's great food. That is no lie. There are so many options for food in Texas, you might not ever set foot in a McDonald's again once you get here!

10. Taco carts?
It may seem ghetto to buy food from a small cart on the side of the road that almost certainly has pest and rodent issues. But no. Looking for delicious and authentic tacos? SEARCH NO FURTHER! Lime and cilantro... Mmm....

Thinking about Texas weather is like a horror movie for northerners, but you learn to appreciate it after a while. Why? Because nobody misses shoveling snow.

11. Tropical weather means no snow and swimming all year round!
Knowing that our weather is close to equal to that of Florida makes life nice. 

However...

12. Allergies will make or break you.
I personally have had bad skin breakouts since moving to Texas, and my whole family has experienced some severe allergies and allergy colds. Yuck!

Coming from a place with such obvious beauty like gorgeous color-changing leaves in the fall and humongous lakes to a flat place with bugs and snakes really makes you aware of what you have.

13. Appreciate the beauty you are given.
In comparison to other places I've been, Texas doesn't immediately scream "pretty", so I've learned to love every bit of the palm trees, flowers, and sunshine that we do have. There are a million different kinds of beauty out there.

This next ones are somewhat random, but they are some friendly reminders.

14. Always wear sunglasses and sunscreen!
I keep forgetting that I'm in Texas where it's always inevitably sunny! With my vampire-like Irish skin, sunscreen is a necessity. I already have some interesting tans in bad places. It's often too sunny outside to see ten feet in front of you without some shades, and the sunshine filtered through the car window isn't much better. This is a very important rule!

15. Texans say "y'all", NOT "you'ns"!!!!
Don't question this one, guys, and don't laugh at me. Long story short, I mistakenly said "you'ns" once and was harshly reprimanded. Ouch.

Lastly, I have grown a great deal in spiritual discoveries this past year. Being in a different church, school, and cultural atmosphere has greatly affected the way I see things in our state and our world.

16. Christian ≠ Christian.
This never occurred as a problem in the north, because northerners would be out with it and tell you straight up whether they were dedicated believers or not. Here in Texas, where church is the social norm, everybody is a Christian. But not really. People say they're Christians and go out and party on the weekends. People say they're Christians and never go to church. 

17. People still need Jesus.
Yes, even in our Bible Belt, Bible-thumpin' culture there are sinners, and there are lost people. There are people who don't know His story. There are people who never will, because nobody will take the time to tell them, because we expect them to already know. That kid at your lunch table? Might not know who Jesus is. That lady at work? May not have ever set foot in a church building. You never know. Don't think for one minute that everyone is already aware of the saving grace of Jesus Christ. 

Some people may be offended by what I have written here, hence Lesson #4. Some may find it funny. Some may not take it seriously because I'm just a little youth minister's daughter who doesn't know what she's talking about. My reason for writing this is not just to let out all the thoughts that have been swimming in my head for this past year, but to share what I have learned in the hopes that this will, in some way, bless someone else, and pass on what little wisdom I have gained from Texas so far. Wow! Texas really isn't that bad. 

Failed Missions

What decides if a mission is failed? Generally speaking, whenever we set out to do something and the outcome is undesirable or not what were expecting, we tend to label that a fault, or if you're extreme like me, a failed mission.

A girl I knew in a past school was one of these missions. I had met her through connections with other friends, and she was also on my bus to and from the middle school in our neighborhood. She was that certain type of girl- you could tell by looking at her that something wasn't quite right. With my missionary-esque personality, finding people like her is always intriguing because it gives me a excuse to share my faith and friendship with someone who may never receive it anywhere else, so naturally, I started getting to know her right away.

Alexis didn't come to school all the time. One day she would be there, and then intermittently she would disappear for days (and months) at a time. No one ever really knew why she was gone or where she was, and it seemed that only I and the attendance office sensed her absence. I was curious about this so I started sitting with Alexis on the bus home from school.

It could have been a coincidence, the unsettling feel about her and all the school absences, but as in most cases, it was not. I began to discover some about Alexis that I never would have been at liberty to guess just by looking at her.

If I remember correctly, her dad was out of the picture, and she lived with her mom and mom's boyfriend in a small house they couldn't afford. She told tales of abuse and drug misuse in her 'home' as if they were the swingsets, sandboxes, and popsicles we so stereotypically recall from our own childhoods- as if they were the norm she could expect from her everyday life from infantry though adolescence.

Many times I inquired about the role of religion in Alexis's world. See, we tend to get the notion that everyone has heard the story of the Gospel, but she had no clue. She experimented about with witchcraft and the supernatural- and no one knew- and no one tried to stop her. I had no idea what the Wiccan religion was until I met Alexis.

This was not all. Alexis was also confused about sexual orientation- not just hers but the people around her. She honestly didn't know if homosexuality was moral or immoral and had to turn to me to get the non-societal answer. She got herself involved with the wrong kind of boys- all of which were years older than she. She boasted of her indecent relationships, though it was quite obvious that they had no fruit to bear for her wellbeing. Lexi tended to get into trouble with things along those lines, and if people knew anything about her, that was it.

I had gathered all the information I needed; her family status, religion status, relationship status. My mission began.

Alexis didn't have a Bible. She had never heard the stories before. So I started simple, bringing up verses in casual conversation, referencing various beliefs and principles. Gradually, she became interested. I eventually started to bring a small Bible to school (which, now that I think about it, was probably against the rules) and reading to her on the bus home. It seemed to me that she was catching on really fast, and legitimately desired the spiritual nourishment I was feeding her, verse by verse.

Though Lexi seemed to be changing for the better, her home life remained a wreck. Lexi contemplated the pros and cons of running away and living with a distant relative or friend. I didn't know what to do, so I simply offered my home as refuge if she needed a place to stay. Praise God, to my knowledge she never succeeded in carrying out the plan.

Also through the rising action of my ministry Alexis revealed to me that she cut herself. She showed me the proof- the intimidating scars that decorated her arms that she so silently shrouded in a large parka day by day. She confided that she used anything she could find to scar herself physically to escape her mental and emotional grief.

Lexi, who claimed to be improving in both religious and physical states, chopped off all her beautiful, wavy red hair soon after my discovery of her self harm. She said it was for the fashion and for no other reason, but I knew that wasn't it. Months later she began dyeing it bizarre colors and wearing dark, depressing clothing.

Another thing she divulged, as if there was more to divulge (there was), was her taste in music. I listened to a song with her once. I will never forget those words:
Dangle my feet off the edge
Just one more slit in the wrist
Just three more pills
The pain will end soon, yeah

But she only listened to the song because of its infectious beat.

This was it- the climax of my ministry with Alexis. We had been studying and I had been praying for months, and I really saw God working in both of us, helping us to really step out of our comfort and experience metamorphosis into something new, an experience unique for us both.

As the bus pulled up to my street on a sunny spring day, Alexis reached over and stopped me in my tracks. She told me that she wanted me to know how thankful she was for what I was doing for her... And that her boyfriend of fifteen (we were eleven or twelve at the time) had been scaring her with sexual things lately. I warned Alexis about what we had talked about and that if she was under pressure she needed to stand her ground and get out. She agreed and made a pinkie promise that she wouldn't do anything she would later regret.

That was a pretty good week.

A week later, I was walking to my locker before first hour algebra when up shuffled Lexi. She broke down in tears. I translated from a scarcely intelligible murmur in my ear that Alexis had been pressured into sex.

Rather than showing compassion, I flipped. My face went red hot and I completely imploded. I couldn't believe what I had heard. I remember being angry at God. I remember mentally screaming at him all week about how hard I had tried and how far we had come- all for nothing. 

Now we revisit the initial question. What deems a mission a failed one? I thought the ship had sunk because Lexi made a bad choice. But her choice wasn't my fault. I hadn't done anything wrong. Truthfully, one decision doesn't mean Alexis won''t come back around someday. After all, the seeds have been sown.

I know for a fact that there were people who knew and witnessed Jesus that chose not to follow him. Some of his own followers betrayed and denied him. Now that I am older, I do not believe that Jesus would consider those as failed missions.

We can't stop ministering because we are afraid of failure. Yes, treasures are being stored up in Heaven, but the bigger picture is that people can't save themselves. They need to be saved. And no one was saved by the fear of a failed mission.